33 / F / 260ish lbs (will weigh in first thing tomorrow morning)
I've been heavy my whole life. On top of that, I'm really tall, so people have no qualms about calling me "big." I get that comment weekly. Sometimes people are kind (🙄) enough to follow up a "big" comment with "I just mean that you're so tall!" Right. Interesting how my 5'11" 150 lb best friend is never called big. Anyway.
I've tried to diet so many times, bla bla bla, and here I am hoping SO HARD for success for the millionth time. I'm posting this because I've been lurking on reddit for a year now and I want to be an active part of this community. So here are my fears and here's hoping I can slowly peel them away -
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I'm afraid that I'll fail because I've been overweight for so long it seems like I'm doomed to be fat forever
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I'm afraid I'm not disciplined enough to resist temptation
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I'm afraid of what I'll have to face and what will surface when I'm not shoving food in my mouth hole to stuff my feelings down. This is the scariest thing. And things like "go for a walk!", "chew some gum", and "take a few deep breaths" won't cut it for me. I have some issues. I've recently seen a psychiatrist and have also reached out to a counselor, but am open to all suggestions/tips/strategies/books/etc.
Thanks in advance, new friends!
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