A part of me is really excited to having this project be private and all mine.
Maintaining an active lifestyle has always been an on again off again thing with me and I've tried so many different hobbies and diets. I'm tired of feeling like I've failed.
I don't want to tell my family that I'm cutting down on consuming red meat because they call out the few times that I do. They mean well and want to help me stay on track, but I want to call the shots and be totally confident in my decisions without that little sting of regret.
I don't want to tell my boyfriend how my good/bad sleeping patterns are because sometimes I want to sacrifice a bit of sleep to hit a study goal.
I don't want to post on social media whenever I hit the gym because I don't want validation that is heavily focused on what my body looks like. I want to feel more confident in my skin.
I don't want to hike with friends all the time - trying to keep up or slow down. I want to go at my own pace to beat my PR.
I just want to do it my way and have fun without all the pressure. I want to be a better horseback rider, learn to go backpacking, and run outside with doggo.
I have a consultation with a personal trainer this week. I'm really excited because I think this is the moment where I just have to go for it.
So, yeah, is it weird of me to want to keep this a secret for 6+ months until I feel that I've found what works for me?
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